i am officially 20 weeks along in my pregnancy & baby bump is in full effect and totes visible now all the time, even when i lay down and your stomach usually flattens out. he’s there! can’t believe this is the half-way-there mark, it’s gone by so fast it seems but my body keeps changing. my boobs are huge and like everyone says, your nipples really do get dark. i don’t have stretch marks yet, but i’m prone to get them, so will be ordering this to try to help. i’ve gained a total of 20 pounds already which freaks me out, but i’m making a more conscious effort to eat better and exercise more, at least keep my body in motion and take walks every night. i try not to be too hard on myself about the weight gain, but it is something that is always on my mind. i haven’t really felt him yet but think i felt my first “flutters” the other morning. it felt like there was a muscle twitch from the inside and i looked down and couldn’t see anything. i poke on my belly all the time to feel him, but i think he’s too small at this point still. we had our 20-week appointment today and all is well, baby boy is growing at a great rate and seems healthy and happy in there. he weighs 13-ounces and is as long as a banana. #bananababy we had an ultrasound today so we were able to see him moving his arms and legs around, see his little, fast heartbeat & and the silhouette of his face and body, which was so cool!
you can kind of make out his side face silhouette in the below sonogram, half the time we didn’t know what we were really looking at, but the more i study it the more i see his head, nose, and little mouth. #swoon
for the most part, i am wearing dresses every day. jeans don’t work and i don’t really like maternity jeans. a sweet friend from work gave me a few pairs, but i just don’t like them and i do love dresses, so it’s all good. this beautiful maxi is one i picked up this past weekend from a boutique called grace & edge which was at the boho market at community brewery this time. we love the boho market & it being at a brewery was a reason for dekel and my dad & sisters to come too, since they were in town visiting from connecticut. i love the flowiness of it and the salmon color is gorgeous. i had been eying this dress and turns out it’s the exact same one, just in a different color!
i thought it would be fun to start documenting my experience, maybe not every week, but i want to remember my feelings and thoughts throughout this pregnancy & be able to share them with you.
i’m feeling really good! besides having a bump in my lower abdomen (which i joke is a food baby most of the time) i don’t really feel or look pregnant. he pops out more in the evenings after work. i’m completely over the nausea/morning sickness phase (thank goodness!) and the smell aversions have passed and now i’m just hungry all the time and i finally feel like i have some energy back. finding clothes that work is a struggle, jeans are a no-go most days but i’m enjoying flowy dresses as of late. to keep my body in motion dek & i go on walks with the dogs after work and every saturday morning we go to the park by our house and i walk while he runs, today i jogged a lap which felt really good. as for cravings, i’m super into sour stuff, like tart grapefruit juice and sour candies (this is not a stretch from my normal behavior though, ha!) and also really into salads with vinegarette. we’re starting to plan a babymoon! i got really emotional the other night thinking this would be our last trip without a baby in our lives and without a worry of another human being depending on us, i really am going to miss it just being ‘me & dek.’ we’re excited about this new chapter, but it’s also like closing a door on what was and that struck me hard. i’ll keep you posted on where we think of going, we’re limited due to the zika virus and since i want to be by a beach, currently on our list is bahamas, hawaii and grand cayman.
<dress & sandals- marshall’s, sunnies- forever21, purse- from a vintage store in LA>
& it’s a BOY!!!!!! we’re expecting our first little baby later this year! oct. 1 to be precise but with my birthday on sept. 28 and with my luck i will turn 33 and go into labor all in one day, ha!
we’ve been trying to get pregnant since our trip to bali last may. i’ll never forget the afternoon we decided it was time to start our family. we had been talking about when would be the “right time” and all of a sudden it hit us…we were sitting in a cafe in seminyak called ‘the fat turtle‘ and we were casually having brunch and an austrailian couple about our age next to us had the cutest kids, one about 2 or 3 and one in a stroller sleeping and i had an out-of-body experience where i envisioned our future life like that was us with our two kids still traveling the world & we started talking about how having kids should not stop us from adventuring or traveling, just enrich our lives and bring us joy, so it was that day i stopped taking my birth control pills. i’d been taking them daily since high school so wasn’t sure how long it would take for them to wash out of my system and my ovulation cycle to normalize back out, but here we are not even a year later and i’m growing a life inside of me! it still is so crazy saying that & thinking there’s a heartbeat in my belly that’s beyond mine.
this journey so far has been a rollercoaster. i was in shock and disbelief at first. i’ll never forget taking a pregnancy test because my period was late and seeing two pink lines, the test clearly says that if you see two lines (even if the second line is faint it means positive) but i took another two tests, ya know…. just to be sure. after feeling confident in my tests i ran into the kitchen and told dek who squeezed me and then i snapped this pic to my sister:
i wasn’t feeling any symptoms when i found out i was pregnant, i think because i found out so early, i was literally a few days late for my first missed period so i was probably only about 5 weeks preggers at this point. we went to dinner with my mom that weekend and i told her by giving her a card that said “baby” on the front and i wrote “in the oven” on the inside and even though i told her not to tell anyone, she was so excited she told the waitress at dinner! debbie was (& still is!) so full of excitement and joy, it’s hard to get mad at her. i love my mom so much! at around 7 weeks was when i started to feel nauseous all the time, especially when i would first wake up in the morning and it would last until mid-afternoon. when i saw my doctor a week later she recommended eating more small meals throughout the day and keeping things like crackers by the bed so i could nibble before even getting up. i found things like gatorade, goldfish & fruit helped me, but really all i was “craving” were carbs and sweets. i wanted nothing to do with healthy food and some things (& smells!) like eggs were such a turnoff. i wasn’t sure how to go about telling my friends and especially work, but i knew i wanted to wait at least until i saw a doctor to quadruple confirm and also hear that all was good with the little baby & i’m glad i did because seeing a sonogram with a little baby bump growing inside me made it so, so real.
after my first doctor visit at around 8 weeks, i invited my closet girlfriends & sister over for a mimosa brunch because i wanted to tell them in person and hug their necks, which is exactly how it went down. my bestie molly knew before coming over because she guessed! she’s a mind-reader and when i said i wanted to host a brunch she texted me “are you pregnant?” and i was like “how the hell does she even know?!?!” but it worked out because she was able to secretly film everyone’s reaction, which i still tear up at watching & am thankful it’s on video.
i’m now at the 15-week mark and have passed the nausea phase and am feeling more energized and good! we found out and revealed the gender to our work and family & friends, so it’s all becoming even more real than before if that’s even possible. thinking of what’s in me as a boy is crazy. i have to admit that i was disappointed to find out it’s a boy as i really wanted a girl. i somehow envisioned myself with a girl and felt like that was what i was growing, but i was wrong! that feeling of disappointment has since passed, i really just want a healthy baby, but it was like a small dream was crushed when we got the bloodwork results from week 12 doctor visit and opened it together at our kitchen island & scrolled down to find “male.” i know i will love this baby unconditionally, but i’m just being honest. i’ve now formed a small belly pooch which to me is this awkward in-between of baby bump and food baby, but dekel kisses it every morning and my friends at work touch my belly and get excited for me and this compounds the joy inside. i’m happy to have shared my secret and now that it’s out in the open i’m excited to connect and learn from other moms and future-moms. this is just a whole new chapter in the book of life we have turned and it’s really exciting, scary, thrilling, crazy, emotional and fun at the same time.